Wednesday, September 8, 2010

PROTON PEOPLE IN NANOUSE

The Song of the Sorcelator (TSotS)

by L H Franzibald

Following the exploits of "Sorcelator" Grimm Shado, The Song of the Sorcelator has been described as a complete and shameless rip-off of the Elemenstor Cycle. To quote a well known source close to the material, "Wherever he has not directly stolen [from]...the Elemenstor Saga, he has corrupted it beyond recognition."

Originally launched by Magic Mouse Publishing as a re-branding of the only marginally successful The Elspinster Saga, from the Ukrainian Glekt-Franzibald Publishing Ltd, this work claims to be "hipper re-imagining" of their own work, but borrows even more liberally from The Elemenstor Cycle.

Apparent greater mass market appeal not withstanding, all fans of the Elemenstor Saga are entreated to unite against this growing threat. Do not give in to the seductive nature of sorcelation! Its pleasures will be strictly transitory and no match for the richer pleasures of true Epicness.

It is worth noting that the likeness of Grimm Shado appears in the ElamenSTAR episode "Elemenstory, My Dear Wendel," where several minutes of not-so-subtle mockery take place before the episode continues.

The Song of the Sorcelator is widely regarded as a futile attempt to emulate Tycho Brahe's literary style. Chief among Franzibald's many shortcomings is his way of inserting entire sentences, paragraphs or even chapters where Brahe would settle for one or more elegant semicolons. This has inspired ELotH:TES fans to write "Franzies", subtle yet hilarious parodies where pieces from the Elemenstor Cycle are rewritten in Franzibald style. Perhaps the most famous franzy would be the collaborative "Franzymistress(es) of Arvalyyon" fan project.

Interestingly enough, the famous literary critic and poet Huzzan Jamal wrote an extended piece on the symbolic relationships that were depicted in TSotS, between Grim his pirate space hooker sidekick, and how they finely captured the zeitgeist of modern western society as a whole. The article has sparked a new debate about the literary merits of this questionably derivative work between fans of both camps.

Excerpts


The ninja shaman teetered awesomely at the edge of the rooftop; his motile lettuce foodniliar likewise teetered. "Let's take this to the limit," he sneered at Grimm. "Let's take this to the limit extreme."

Grimm considered the proposition even further, desperate now for a reason to mistrust this ninja shaman. It was said that to leave the Penthouse was deepest doom, but he had seen this stranger leap up from its gutters with no difficulty. Clearly the warning was no more than uncertain myth. His face scrunching with resistance, he accomplished at last, "To the max." -The Song of the Sorcelator, page 66 (as lifted almost word-for-word from Book 3)
"I'm a dangerous man, Brandi." uttered Grimm mysteriously and grittily (and dangerously). He could see that she felt smitten by his mysterious gritty danger - all of the buxom fox dancers in this seedy joint did. She fluttered her copious eyelashes and reclined into his gruff arms. Gruffly, he muttered, "This is badical, girl." -The Song of the Sorcelator, page 72 (an almost clearcut copy of Felthar and Serafina's dialogue in the bear dancing club in Book 6)
A voice was heard to say, "Who dares disturb the Crypt Of The Immortal Space Bitches?"

"I am Grimm Shado," said Grimm Shado, his triple wand claws extending. "And I am here to take it to the limit." -The Song of the Sorcelator, page 179 (if this is based on an actual excerpt, it has been corrupted beyond recognition)
Steadying himself atop the speeding Lamborghini, the sorcelator drew his twin wands - Hurt and Burn. He was going to make damn sure the Pirate Assassins and their Metal Friends rued this day, and rued it hard. -The Song of the Sorcelator, page 192 (as lifted almost word-for-word from Book 9 (see: Trans-Am))
"You'll never take it to the limit!" said The Indominatrix over the roar of the speedboat engine. Grimm looked up across the bow to the approaching crest of Niagara Falls. He thought for a moment about how badass it was going to be to send an exploding speedboat over the falls with a domnatrix assassin onboard. "Then I guess I'll have to settle with sending you to hell," he replied, as he pulled the ripcord of his parasail-deployer/bomb-detonator. -The Song of the Sorcelator, page 234 (so obvious an example of plagiarism, it's an insult to every ELotH:tES fan's intelligence to point it out)

Wiki

Please place blithering song fancruft here: http://tsots.pbwiki.com instead of filling this Epic wiki with the ravings of an inept hack.

Discussion


Reverand Timothy Sweeny I am utterly appalled at the level of bias on this site. I mean, I was lead to believe that this wiki was for discussing Epic Legends of the Hierarchs, but it seems you fan boys just use this as an excuse to whine because your precious little elitist borgious fantasy can’t compare to one of the best literary works of our decade. Yes that’s right, Song of the Sorcelator is flat out better Elemonstor and everyone who isn’t clouded by bias knows it. Franzibald’s art deals with contemporary issues relevant to the modern world in ways Brahe’s uninspired Tolkein ripoff couldn’t even begin to match. It saddens me that the fantasy genre is so tied to it’s roots that when a truly breakaway product comes along, nobody, gives it the appreciation it deserves, indeed having the nerve to criticise it as a ripoff for simply superficial similarities that ob scure the vast creative gulf between hacks like this ‘Tycho’ and best selling authors like Franzibald. For instance, the much touted ‘hurt and burn’ extract on page 192 of Song of the Sorcelator (196 on my limited copper-plate xtreme collectors edition, obtained at great expense by me at Franzicon after patiently stalking the Master for three days till he threw it at my head). Now a biased Elemonstor-nut immediately clings to the flimsy parallels between the main characters poise and the Master’s use of the word ‘rued’ (I mean come on people! Rued is a perfectly common English word and its testament to you is horrific bias that you can’t comprehend two writers might ever find the same word in the dictionary). Now an unbiased, objective mind immediately sees that Tyco’s grade school (no I take that back, I wouldn’t wish that hacks verbose, archaic excuse for prose on anyone under the age of 70) drivel is nothing more than appeal to the most tiresome of fantasy clich├ęs, evidently itself derived from Sweeny’s dated but serviceable horror ‘Shadow over Bumfluff’ injected with ridiculously outlandish made-up words of the type that pervade all forms of mediocre fantasy. The Master on the other hand, produces what can objectively be described as a much more creative work, inventing not only the concept of individuaain of rotting TV dinners and mail-order NRA magazines accumulate, bespeaking of his bigoted psychopathic mind. Having objectively proven that Tycho is a radical-right wing sexist paedophile with racial-supremecist tendencies it quite frankly baffles me why Brahe continues to have a cult following. Am I the only unbiased objective person in the world who understands?!!!

Jute Mill As loathe as I am to say it, I'm fairly well-acquainted with this work. Comparing it with ELOTH:TES and Elspinster... hmm. As the Elspinster Saga was to ELOTH:TES, so is The Song of the Sorcelator to ELOTH:TES, were ELOTH:TES hit by a car driven by over-the-top action anime, violated by a hobo, then pieced back together with fragments of a John Woo movie by an insane super-scientist with a penchant for creating crass literary knock-offs. Basically, they went back and attempted to out-Epic ELOTH:TES. Of course, out-Epic-ing ELOTH:TES, which is, by definition, the practical limit of Epic, results only in hilarious juvenile meandering and actual, unironic utterance of the word "bullet time" to describe heroic action. Although, you gotta admit--two wands, hella-awesome.
Montykins I think the existence of The Song of the Sorcelator helps explain why people sometimes seem to have very different recollections of ELotH:TES -- it could be that people have read both, and are mixing up their memories of the actual, original Hierarchs saga with the shoddy knockoff.

Finn34 Two wands makes no sense to me. If you're just as powerful with one, how is two wands going to help you? I mean, it LOOKS badass. But, c'mon.
Nate-yo Two wands are rather pimp, but Finn34 has a point, what's the deal wit'dat? It's like giving a zombie a trench-coat, he's cool because he wants your brains, not because he wants to be stylish while wanting them...
xxx_SorcelationWizKid_xxx Although he is equally powerful with one wand as opposed to two, with two wands he can channel his powers into the arenas of "hurt" and "burn." This sorcelation avoids the disadvantage of only having one power, namely the power of painful burning. If the sorcelator so chooses, he may now inflict hurt without leaving visible burn marks, or may burn without causing pain. This adds a great deal of power, as he can now make people so horribly mishapen from burn wounds that it causes mental anguish, but physical anguish is missing, at least until the peasants hang him for being such a wretch. You Elemenstor fans can't even touch that kind of power can you, bitch?
TychoCelchuuu GET OFF MY INTERNET YOU SORCELATOR BITCHES

Ok! Fun is fun! But it appears that one of you guys from this wiki sabotaged the TSotS wiki... stating quite clearly on the front page "TSOTS IS A HOAX!"!!! I'm all for a little friendly rivalry between franchises, but when it starts resorting to vandalism (which is exactly what I would expect from you play-it-safe Brahe fanboys) I have you call you on it!! I don't know who it was... I just know that it wasn't jake because of the handle of the person who posted... whoever it was... this will be your only warning! -Shado X-treme
Who could do such an evil scheme? Certainly, no one here. We are dedicated buch of fans, who will resort to violence only when its absolutely necessary (or really, really funny). Our only desire is a calm discussion. even with you, Sorcelator bitches. - Jake.

Hurt'n'Burn You dipshits have no idea! SORCELATOR 4EVA!!!!!!!!!!!!!111
Finn34 Die, Sorcelator bitch. Your series is not EPIC enough for us.
Terathis The truest way I can illustrate the differences here is through a simple word association. L.H. Franzibald is to Tycho Brahe is as fetid undead manure is to sweet sweet Krispy Kreme donuts. Also, Grimm Shado's soliloquys are about as coherent as the mindless babble that proceeds forth from the mouths of the mentally unstable residents of your nearest insane asylum after their afternoon cocktail of Prozac, Xanax, and Zoloft.

DMJ Actually I derive a sort of guilty pleasure from reading this. Its like McMeatys food - you know its wrong, but you have to go back for another Double McMeaty with a Meatshake.

Zeta Book 1 and 2 were alright, but as the series progressed I began to notice that the girls Grim Shadow was sleeping with were gettting younger and younger. This was especially noticable in Chapter 23 of Book 3 which involved a Kindergarden class showing ther "gratitude" to Grim - I won't go any further, I had to burn the book afterwards.

TIM The release of their fourth book is going to be Nov 4th! That's the same release date as the tenth anniverary edition of Book 1!

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